The Foundation of a good marriage that will last a lifetime has to be built by communication. There can never be intimacy without communication. If there is poor verbal communication in marriage, there can never be emotional connection.
In most marriages the problem is not that couple do not talk but how they talk. Some partners are sarcastic and always speakwords that tear down rather than build up. Couples need to remember that what they say and how they say it, can either communicate love or total disregard.
One of the biggest barriers to proper communication in marriage is not listening. Listening means not talking while your partner is talking. Talking while your partner is talking to you can lead to serious conflict.
“Do not let unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit these who listen”.
Unwholesome talk includes cursing, blaming, accusing, gossiping and lying. These things couples should avoid at all cost, if their marriage is to last. Couples should only speak kind words to one another and these kind words must be accompanied by kind actions. Kind actions are important because communication is 60-90 percent nonverbal. I advise that couples should learn each other’s body language and tendencies in order to enhance communication.
I pray that God will help you to become great communicators by being great listeners.
Pastor TL Mashiloane has been married for 18 years. He is the presiding pastor of two Full Gospel Church assemblies, City of Love & Restoration in Sasolburg and Faith Tabernacle in Viljoenskroon.
For further advice and counselling contact Pastor Mashiloane on 082 579 4595 or by Email on firstname.lastname@example.org